Love My Life 5k Update

BLING is in! Registration is open till September 30th. All proceeds benefit the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Celebrate YOUR life while I celebrate and honor my sister's life on her Angel date. LML...Shellee

Color, Indy, and 11 months...

Nothing like be blasted with vivid colors and feeling the vibration of an Indy car flying by at nearly 215 mph to make you feel alive. Both made me think of you Punkin.

Today was 11 months. So hard to believe we've survived these months without you. I thought about it all week and then yesterday was so busy with living/loving life, that I didn't think about "it" though you were on my mind all day. Many times I wished you were there with me or I thought how happy I knew you were that I was having fun. Mom and I talked about it last night as we watched the Indy race and enjoyed the beautiful night; it was perfect out - you know, the way it is after a hot day at the river and then the night is absolutely perfect? Then today, we were all together and goofing off with the hats Tracy sent. I did get teary-eyed after that, but it was a good day too. I think we're going to take them to Ireland :) You are SO missed, and it's so hard to grasp sometimes, but I guess, we are healing a little, and I know that is what you want; what we're supposed to do. There will always be a hole though...

 

 

LML4U...xoxo...Sissy

14 Miles...

That's how many miles I walked (jogged a tad) yesterday in preparation for my marathon in Dublin. Wake up call was 4 a.m. (OMG!) and if any of you know me, right now, morning is not my thing :) But, I did it and I was there at 5 a.m. to begin. I was grateful we started so early and avoided some of the heat, plus, got to see a beautiful sunrise! I actually love that time of the morning. Seemed like the miles weren't too bad, but boy did I feel them later, thankfully, 90 minutes of YIN Yoga (at Just Yoga in Corona) this morning helped work out some of that.

I'm babbling/lol. I think I just want to share the sunrise picture and then this quote I swiped from one of the groups on Facebook. That's really what this blog is all about (though I'm not quite sure how I want to write about it, or can), but that was my sister, thankful for life, hence "Love My Life", and it's true, right now, someone, somewhere is fighting to survive just as she did. So, be thankful.

Feeling Extremely Blessed

The Love My Life (virtual) 5k is picking up steam and I'm so excited! Don't forget to register before it closes on September 30th.

For the details: Inaugural Love My Life 5k

Today has been (well, this week really) so emotional. I think I'm ready for bed (thankfully since we're meeting at 5 a.m. for 14 miles!). First thing this morning, I received a donation notification that not only put me over my goal, it made me #1 Fundraiser for Team Dublin! It was so generous a donation that I was speechless. What an amazing journey this has been for me.

Then, tonight, I get home and check my mail and I have a package. Hmmm. Can't figure that out. I don't remember ordering anything. Oh, it's from Tracy in Alaska:) But I just got my birthday present from her so what is this? Oh my stars! When I finally opened it, all I could do was cry. It's the hats Liz and I put on in the store in Alaska when we were there. I'm so not the silly one. She made me do it that day for the picture, and I'm so glad she did. We didn't buy those hats that day because - what would we do with them? But oh, how many times we both wished we had purchased them since. So to open that box and see those hats - the same ones - was more than I could handle. What an unbelievably thoughtful thing to do. I am touched beyond words yet again today. Thank you Tracy <3

This turned out to be one of my very favorite pictures from that trip, and now one of my VERY, VERY favorite memories...LML

September...

I can't believe it's September 3rd already. Sometimes I realize it's the middle of summer, or the end of summer, and can't believe it. At times it feels as though time moves like molasses and other times it's so fast it's a blur. As the last days of August came and went, I found myself dreading the approach of September (because that leads to October); the last few weeks of my sister's life a year ago. Marked by the weekends spent with her, I can recall each one.

So, just as I was beginning to feel like I was making a bit of progress in this process called grief, I find myself reliving those weeks/moments (more than normal); some are bittersweet, others sad/painful.

My birthday is fast approaching and for the first time in my life, I am not filled with my usual excitement. Yes, I'm (very) grateful to be celebrating another year (always), but it won't be the same (nothing has been of course, nor will it be) and I find myself just wanting to skip it. Seems when I look back at pictures from birthdays past, they were the best family photos ever; silly, fun, goofy... I guess I'm wondering how... when she is who brought out my silly side:) Maybe I'm over thinking it (I tend to do that/lol). Maybe she'll make her presence known and it will all seem right? or maybe she'll just help me be OK with what IS?

Then comes October... is a year really right around the corner? How on earth have we survived? How has the world not stopped to mourn with us? How does it just keep going on each day while our hearts are broken? That's what happens though and you have to keep putting one foot in front of the other, and in spite of the pain and sorrow, you have to appreciate being alive; to Love My Life, if for no other reason at the moment than the sheer (glorious) fact that you are alive and that in itself is a gift. Liz appreciated that gift every moment she could and that is the legacy she leaves behind.

There are exciting things coming in October as well (so my emotions seem to be in constant conflict). One is the Inaugural Love My Life (virtual) 5K which I hope becomes a very real 5K one day to honor her life by not only continuing the quest for a cure as well as the fact that the very essence of walking or running a 5K is living. What better way to honor her life than to live ours? Quite often I have to remind myself of that, or be reminded (some days it's still hard, but it is what I intend to do; for myself, for her...). And of course, the marathon in Ireland! Sean and I are looking so forward to that! But it will be bittersweet too; emotional, but exciting and fun too.

Well, I need to get to bed. Way past that time and I'll pay for it in the morning. I must stop this late night stuff again.

It was a beautiful sunset tonight at Doheny Beach with friends. LML...